Random Scene Post: Agents – Interrogation

It is once again time for Monday Randomness! And this week I present to you an interrogation scene! Okay it’s not as bad as it sounds. Basically in the continuity I developed for the screenplay version of Hardwired, this comes somewhere…uh…well I haven’t decided where, since I abandoned the screenplay for the novel. I’ve been pretty fickle, I admit. lol But the point is this is supposed to be a comedy scene. Agents, Tiger, Lion, and Jaguar are attempting to extract information from their corrupt deputy director, whom they have captured. Agent Osprey, a junior agent, looks on. But when he sees the interrogation is going south he intervenes in a creative and unconventional manner.



They are interrogating Deputy White in order to find a way to get to Amazon R.

TIGER:   So what weapons did you trade?

TIGER W:   You expect me to tell you?

TIGER:   Sir if you don’t cooperate, we will be forced to resort to extreme measures.

(Jaguar and Lion exchange concerned looks. Osprey takes off his watch and puts it on the table)

TIGER W:   Then do so.

TIGER   Sir we never…

(Osprey opens the channel on the talkback.)

OSPREY:   Wait! I’ll do it.

TIGER:   You’ll what?

OSPREY:   Yeah, yeah, you’re not doing it right. (closes the channel)

TIGER:   What? I…

LION:   (opens the channel) Let him try Tigger. He can’t do any harm.

TIGER:   (shrugs) Alright.

(Tiger leaves the questioning room and Osprey enters with two folders in his hand.)

TIGER W:   (incensed) They send a boy to do a man’s job?

OSPREY:   Yeah, I guess. (pulls a gumball out of his pocket and pops it in his mouth)

TIGER W:   Spit the sucker out, kid.

(Jaguar frowns while Tiger and Lion look at each other in disbelief, but before any of them can tell Tiger White he’s in no position to make demands, Osprey does as he’s told and spits it out—right onto Deputy White’s nose! It immediately emits an electric charge, almost electrocuting him. Osprey calmly puts some gum in his mouth and begins to chew. Tiger White groans in frustration.)

OSPREY:   Now, maybe you’d like to tell me what traffic in weapons is like.

TIGER W:   You know, I have to admit you’re good, kid. (recovers himself a bit) But not good enough!

OSPREY:   Like if I wanted to get a hold of a ray gun, or maybe some lightsabers.

TIGER W:   I don’t know what you’re talking about.

OSPREY:   Or maybe you’d like me to tell you where you store your information.

TIGER W:   Wha…?

OSPREY:   And then you can tell me how to get to it.

TIGER W:   I’ll bet your life you don’t know what you’re talking about!

OPSREY:   And I’ll bet your life I can get that watch off your wrist without you knowing it!

TIGER W:   (scoffing laugh) Impossible! You’re a kid who works in gadgets; you know nothing of the real world.

OSPREY:   (shrugs) As head of gadgets, I like to think that I know a lot about my trade.

TIGER W:   And I know a lot about mine!

OSPREY:   Ah. (opens his folder.) Then you can tell me what this is. (slides a picture TW’s way)

TIGER W:   Oh yes, that’s a VX-1 Ghost.

OSPREY:   And this? (slides him another picture)

TIGER W:   That’s an NF-5 Spirit.

(Osprey nods, opens another folder and pulls out another picture.)

OSPREY:   The two companies, Lockheed Bell and Release Sanctum partnered together to make this model (hands the picture to Deputy White) a faster, more powerful amalgamation of the two.

(Tiger White looks it over.)

TIGER W:   What of it?

OSPREY:   Who commissioned it?

TIGER W:   Chief Roark.

OSPREY:  And who picked it up?

TIGER W:   Rim-shot.

OSPREY:   You’re lying.

TIGER W:   What makes you say that? Your entire life is a lie!

(Osprey ignores Deputy White’s insult and pulls up a video file on the glass touch table.)

OPREY:  This movie was shot at 03:00 hundred hours when the delivery was made.

(Osprey rotates the video for TW to see that he has been caught on film doing the pickup.)

TIGER W:   (under his breath) Blast!

OSPREY:   And this one was shot at 06:00 hours when the delivery was supposed to be made.

TIGER W:   Ah look…

OSPREY:   (interrupts him while skipping back to the previous video) Deputy White, if you could identify the man in this photo, please. (He freezes the video and zooms in.)

TIGER W:   Ah! D…ah…ah…well…Look! I know that this will sound purely evasive, but, I was just there for a date.

OSPREY:   At 3 in the morning?

TIGER W:   Well, I didn’t want to be late, I…

OSPREY:   What was her name?

TIGER W:   Uh…ah…Jack!   (Osprey raises his eyebrows) Jack…lin…Star…bright.

OSPREY:   Where did you meet?

TIGER W:   At the loading pad just out of frame—then we went to a hotel.

OSPREY:   A hotel! That’s pretty cool. What did you do at the hotel?

TIGER W:   Well, we uh…

OSPREY:   Had a good time?

TIGER W:   More or less.

(Osprey scribbles some notes on a paper in his folder.)

JAGUAR:   I’m figuring less.

(Tiger and Lion agree.)

OSPREY:   Alright, we’re done; (snaps his folder shut and places it on the table) thanks for answering my questions chief!

(Osprey gets up and starts for the door.)

TIGER W:   That’s your interrogation?!   You’re terrible! You’ll never amount to anything in the agency!

(Tiger Jaguar and Lion roll their eyes.)

TIGER:  As if he amounted to much.

LION:   Yeah.

(Osprey stops walking away and smirks, then turns to face Deputy White)

OSPREY:   Yo, chief! What time is it? I don’t have a watch on me.

TIGER W:   Hah! It’s… (can’t find his watch on the usual hand) it’s…it’s…it’s… (begins to search frantically in his pockets) it’s…it’s…it’s…it’s…

(Osprey pulls a shiny silver watch out of his pocket and holds it up.)

OSPREY:   This yours?


(Deputy White leaps from his chair, knocks the table over and heads strait for Osprey intending to recover his watch. Osprey quickly slips the watch onto his wrist and leaps aside causing Deputy White to almost hit the bullet/fireproof proof glass wall. But before the good Deputy can turn around Osprey gives him a good kick to the back and…well then he really hits the wall! Osprey nods in satisfaction, opens the door and enters the control room to the astonished expression on the faces of his comrades. He takes the watch off his wrist.)

OSPREY:   Here you go, boys.

TIGER:   Exactly what did you just do?

OSPREY:   I just gave you the information.

JAGUAR:   You did?

OSPREY:  Yeah, yeah, he stores it all on his watch.

(Jaguar Tiger and Lion look shocked.)

OSPREY:   Everyday he backs up his computer to it and deletes the original files. I just gave it to him a couple months ago.

LION:   That’s why you couldn’t find anything on his hard drives!

JAGUAR:   Yeah, I was wondering. Well what do you say we plug it in?

TIGER:  Let’s do it!

OSPREY:   It connects wirelessly.

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